!!!!!!!

Right now is one of those times when I start to freak out about how things will work out. You see, I hate when my bank account drops below a certain number, and after I pay the rent and my car note in the next week, that will happen. What has me stressed is that summertime has historically been a huge pitfall  for my party plan business. People cancel on you left and right because they have other things going on. Graduations. Family events. Mini vacations. It's frustrating because they don't seem to realize how much you are counting on them sticking to their plans with you. Every cancellation is a payday that is lost to you. And when you get cancelled on back to back, it can get scary. Very scary. Especially when that is your main source of income. For example, this month, out of 7 parties that were planned, only one actually took place. One person rescheduled. Everyone else just cancelled. And June and July are not looking any better. It's definitely tough.

However, I have faith that everything will pull through. One thing that I have learned during my time in direct sales is that there is always something you can improve upon. My problem is getting on the phone. I have no problem with approaching people I don't know about my business. I have no problem with doing the actual parties. but when it comes to getting on the phone and calling people to book parties, I'm a big fat chicken. I always feel like I am going to be bothering someone. And, honestly, I hate the idea of hearing no. I guess that is the result of me having worked as a telemarketer for the March of Dimes Jail and Bail event. People were soooooo rude (and for absolutely no good reason) that it has given me phone fear. And I need to get over that. Quick , fast, and in a hurry.

So this is my vow to myself:   I am going to work harder on getting my calendar filled, getting my Beachbody business off the ground, and cranking out these articles. I am also opening up my home for summer childcare. I am determined to not only pay the bills, but to also remain a work-at-home mom. So I am going to do what it takes to make that happen. Just gotta keep my eye on what motivates me...my son. Above all, I am going to continue praying to God to make a way for us.

Woosah!!!

Single Mommy Warrior's Goal: TRUE Wealth

True wealth, to me, is not about having more money in the bank than I know what to do with. It isn't having a huge house with more rooms than I need or driving a new, flashy car every year. It isn't being able to jetset all around the world, staying in luxury resorts and ordering $100 plates. To me, true wealth is having a happy, healthy family. It is having financial security. It is being free from stress and drama. It is having the freedom to stay at home with my son without worrying about how the bills get paid. It is being able to be an active participant in my son's life -- every day, not just nights and weekends. Yes, I would like to have enough money in the bank to live life comfortably. Yes, I would like to be a homeowner and to have a house where Christian and I both have a place to call our own for work and play. Yes, I would LOVE to be able to travel around the world with him and show him all of the wonders that God has created for us to take pleasure in. However, I have my eyes set on much more than material wealth. I want to be personally and spiritually rich.


I want to take a minute to share with you an excerpt from Dani Johnson's book "First Steps to Wealth". Dani is woman after my own heart. She went from being a broke (and I mean BROKE-- as in $2.08 to her name broke) and homeless single mother to being a multimillionaire. Listen to what she has to say about wealth. I'm sure you will agree.

"I have a holistic approach to wealth. True wealth to me is accumulating money without sacrificing your marriage, kids, health, or fun. It is crossing over from being a slave to money, to making money your slave -- getting money to work for you.

Wealth is also using your wisdom, knowledge, and skills to benefit others, such as teaching your kids how to accumulate wealth. Don't you want to know you are grooming your kids for success and not failure. You should not want anyone else to mold the mind of your son or daughter.

What about accumulating wealth without sacrificing your health? Or having great relationships with co-workers, your community, and clients? Or being able to secretly bless people who are not expecting it but are so greatly in need?

You can use your life to benefit  the lives of others. By using your intelligence and the skills you develop through the years, your accumulated wisdom can help change a family, which in turn changes a generation."

I took several things from reading these few paragraphs:

1. Be wary of what you are sacrificing in your journey to achieve your goals. If you are neglecting your family, friends, health, or happiness it probably isn't worth it. I know sooo many people who make good money (or enough money) at their jobs but they are MISERABLE. To me, if your job is  keeping you from your family, making friendships a nonexistent luxury, causing you a great deal of stress, negatively impacting your health, making you constantly grumpy or agitated, and just all around making your life miserable, you need to start looking for another way to make ends meet. Honestly, I would take a pay cut if it meant that I would not have to go to a job I hate.

2. God blessed me with the opportunity to raise and love Christian. That is my passion and my duty. The line about not leaving the molding of your child's mind in the hands of others mirrors my reasons for wanting to homeschool Christian.

3. So many people let money rule their lives. They worry about the lack of money. When they have money, they spend so much time figuring out how they can spend it to show other people how successful they are. People often say that money is the root of all evil. That, however is a misquote. In fact, the LOVE of money is the root of all evil. Don't let money, or the lack thereof, take over your life.

4. Reciprocity is another essential part of true wealth. Being able to and actually taking the time to help those less fortunate than you is a sign that you are in a good place -- not just financially, but as a person. Typing this, I am reminded of a friend who , when I was really struggling during my first few months as a single mom, took the time to reach out to me. She talked to me and listened. She gave me words of encouragement. She also helped me out financially. And I didn't even ask her to. She saw that I was in need and she took it upon herself to help me fulfill that need. I will never forget that act of  kindness or what it represented. For all I know, she may not have been in a great financial situation herself, but she still gave what she could to help my little family. To me, that is a sign of true wealth.

So what about you guys? What is the key to wealth for you? How do you define wealth? What matters most to you? What drives you?

Achieving Personal and Financial Freedom!!!

Hey everyone!

To be perfectly honest, I continue to struggle financially. I am not in imminent danger of eviction or repossession or even of having utilities cut off. But if things do not change SOON, those possibilities will arise. That's why I am taking some time to really do some personal development and business business building. In that order. I truly believe that you have to change your mindset to change your reality. You can join the most successful company in the world, but if you are still lazy, negative, and unwilling to step outside of your comfort zone you will not be a success. With that being said, I have been working on going after what I want, no matter what and trying to remain positive despite whatever challenges I may face. My ability to do this stems largely from my newfound faith in God as well as my renewed confidence in myself.

As those who have been reading my statuses on my personal Facebook page know, I have been with Pure Romance for a while and am now a Beachbody coach. I also regularly ghostwrite for a website that is right up my alley. It is rather challenging to juggle these three things along with being a single mom and going to school. My goal is to ultimately be able to live my life by design, not by default. To achieve personal AND financial freedom. To be able to rest assured that my bills will be paid without ever having to decide if one bill should take priority over another. To never again have to worry about being evicted or losing my car (and, thus, my means of making money). Oh, and I can't forget to mention that I want to be able to do all of this without HAVING to go back to working for someone else. I love being my own boss! And if I ever go back to working for someone else, I want it to be my CHOICE, not my only option.

I am reading a motivational/business development book by Dani Johnson that is called "First Steps to Wealth"..  I think that it will really help me to shift my attitude and change the way I do things so that I will see the results that I desire and possibly even some that I never had the courage to dream of. My mom introduced me to this author (who is VERY inspiring -- she went from being a homeless, single mother to a multi-millionaire) and I am very thankful that she did. I always appreciate when people share great info with me. So, I hope you guys don't mind if I share a little bit of what I am learning with you. Maybe something will resonate with you and help you get (back) on the path to achieving YOUR dreams.

I am on the road to freedom. Join me!

Introducing...Me!

Hi everyone...Tiffany here! For those of you who don't know me, I am the mother to an awesome little guy named Christian (currently 19.5 months). Though being a mom is my main role (and I wouldn't have it any other way), I have a lot of other things going on. I am a fulltime student at Capella University pursuing my master's in Counseling psychology. I am a business owner (Pure Romance consultant and Beachbody coach). I am an aspiring author (Last year I started working on a teen fantasy novel and am looking forward to getting back to it soon). I am a freelance journalist. I do all of this...alone.

I have been a single mom for over a year and it has definitely been a challenge. I have been through a lot in these past three years. Entered into a great relationship that quickly went to hell. Endured two years of emotional and (at times) physical abuse. After becoming single, I went through a lot of financial struggles. And, honestly, I am still struggling. But at least I am staying afloat. And, more importantly -- I am happy. And so is my son. My house is not always clean (in fact, I sometimes have to turn down requests for visits from friends because my house is so embarrasing, lol). I'm not the best cook. My time management skills are suspect at best. My organizational skills are atrocious. I am a professional procrastinator. Yeah, it's challenging. But I do what is best for my son...always.

I owe a great deal of thanks and glory to God. He has definitely proven his existence to me in these past few years. I know many doubt Him and many more are just outright against Him. But, for me and my family, God is everything. Without Him here to lean on and to pull me up when I can't gather the strength to get up myself, I don't know where I would be.

Anyways, I never knew that my life would take me down this path. Had you asked me 5 years ago where I would be right now, it would not have been here. But, honestly, there are few things in my life that I regret and even fewer things that I would actually change. The Butterfly Effect may have been a "meh" movie (Sorry, Ashton, but you will always be Kelso to me), but the concept is so true. You never know what changing even the smallest detail in your life will result in. With that being said, I am grateful for the things that have happened to me. Each event has taught me a lesson. Each situation has helped me to develop a little bit more. Each hardship has strengthened me.

 I am on the road to becoming the woman and mother that God has created me to be. I invite you to join me in my journey.

Single Mommy Warrior and Stinkbutt Ninja!!!!

Disclaimer: This post is very rushed. You'll have to excuse me. There was so much to condense into one post. Lol

Wow, so I suck. I have not posted in, like, a year. Well, eight months, but come on Tiffany. Such a slacker. Lol. How to describe life since my last update? Exciting. Challenging. Awesome. Frustrating. Unbelievable. If anything this period of time has taught me:

1. God is definitely real and is working in my life in big ways. I never doubted His existence and have always been a Christian. But I never had a real testimony of His greatness. Well, now I do. Despite being chronically unemployed and not having any true source of income, I was always able to pay my bills for my car, my house (though I did end up having to move out of my apartment to a much nicer yet cheaper HOUSE), and utilities.  At one point I had no clue where I was going to live. Then the people across the street from my parent moved out and I went over there and asked if it was going to be rented. He said yes. I asked how much (and was nervous about the answer), and when he said $350 a month for a 2 bedroom/2 bath house with a big backyard I jumped on it! lol. When I was at a point where I NEEDED a job, somehow I always found one and was always hired on the spot. When I couldn't take my last job any longer, I realized that I had been sitting on an amazing business opportunity (Pure Romance) for several months not realizing what a gold mine it was (I had joined the company in November, but didn't start doing anything until January. I have since added 5 people to my team and am working on getting my sales up)Now I am able to be a stay at home mom and STILL pay the bills. And all because God has my life in his hands. I definitely give Him the credit and glory for my survival and happiness.

2. Tears are only temporary. Despite me being able to pull through as far as finances, there have been some huge hurdles. Basically I did someone a favor involving money. I didn't realize that the money was not deducted from my account immediately, so when I checked my balance I assumed that that was money I had to spend. Then when they FINALLY deducted the money from my account, I overdrafted. I (without ever planning on utilizing it) had enrolled for a $500 overdraft limit when I opened my bank account. I knew how it worked. What I didn't know was that if you overdrafted, you would not receive any notice that you had. So here I am using my card for regular things. Toiletries. Food . Diapers. Not even anything big. And EVERY time I swiped my card, they charged that amount PLUS a $35 fee to my bank account. It took me two days to notice it. I had an order to place from a party I had done and was checking to make sure I had enough in my account to cover it. My bank statement was several HUNDRED dollars in the negative. WTF?

Heart racing I rushed to the bank. The lady at the window pulled up my account and told me that all of my money was gone. I was just like "How?" WHen she explained it to me and I came to realize that it was not a fluke, I broke down crying in the drive thru. All I could think about was the fact that I had NO MONEY but my rent and car note were due soon. And when I say I was crying, I mean I was crying. Tears flowing, eyes bloodshot, hands raised to God asking "What do I do"? The lady at the window started crying too. She credited $200 back to my account but that was the most she could do. At the time Christian had nearly $400 in his savings account. This was something that I was very proud of. That I was able to even begin investing in his future. I ended up having to use up nearly all of his savings just to get my balance back out of the negative. All of my hard work...gone in 10 seconds. Just thinking about that day makes me cry all over agian. That sense of complete and utter helplessness and failure. *sigh*

Then there was the day my electricity got cut off. Now, this was more to do with my lack of memory. I forgot when my bill was due. I came back home after being gone for a week to find my lights off, the house freezing, the food in the fridge spoiled and the food in the freezer in danger of spoiling. My house is all electric so I could not even cook or take a hot bath. I immediately got on the phone with the electric company to pay the bill and have them come out. They could not come until the next day. In the meantime, Christian is sitting there shivering so hard is teeth are chattering  while he keeps repeating "Mama mama mama". Of course, I broke down then. Fail. Again.

And, though I hate to admit it, I cried when Tyrell's first "baby mama" contacted me to tell me that not only was he having sex with one of the same girls that he had cheated on me with while I was pregnant (and who he probably met up with when he took a week vacation to go back home not too long before he left for good), but that she was living with him (in his mom's basement, the loser), had gotten her pregnant, AND was engaged to her. Now, I don't love him. In the least. Sometimes I have the horrible thought that my life would be so much simpler if he were dead (Bad Tiffany!). But that sh!t hurt. Mind you, he has not been in contact with us since I told him that there was absolutely no way that I was moving to Baltimore. That was in June of last year. He has not called/texted/emailed me AT ALL to even ask if Christian was ok. Not even on his birthday. No presents. No monetary assistance. Nothing. To have him move on so quickly, with no regrets apparently hurt. For him to get away without any responsibilities while I struggle made me mad. To have him act as though my son does not matter or even exist pissed me the fuck off. So now I am making the moves to preserve me and my son's happiness. And that's all I will say about that on here. :)

3. So many other strong, smart, beautiful women go through the same thing. I have so many friends who end forced into Single Mommydom. Men suck. I am learning that that is more reality than exaggeration. How someone can hurt the ones they love (be it through physical or emotional abuse, infidelity, or abandonment/neglect) I will NEVER understand. But what I do know is that it is not us who are the weak ones. It's you "men". The ones who give in to temptation. Who don't know a fanfrickingtastic thing when you have it sitting right in front of you. The ones who create life and then toss it aside as though it does not matter. Who walk out on your wives, fiances, sons, and daughters without looking back. Who live your lives in a carefree manner while WE raise your children, and then decide to pop up out of nowhere several years down the road to reap the benefits of what we have put out blood, sweat, and tears into. You little boys are pathetic and, honestly, the best thing you have done with your lives is to provide us with our children. You serve no other purpose. Just thought I would share that.

Ok, lol. I feel myself getting riled up. Ugh! Where have all the good men gone?

Anyways, life is great. Not perfect. Still not where I need to be financially, but I'm getting there. More importantly, my son is truly the best thing that I could have asked for. I am sooooooooooooooVERY blessed to be his mommy. :D

The ups and downs of single mommydom

Life as a single mom...is hard. All of a sudden I am the only breadwinner. I am playing the role of two parents, and I admit that I don't do a perfect job. I get frustrated and annoyed. I let him cry it out because "mommy needs to do her work" or "mommy needs to cook and clean". The house is often messy. The laundry is piling up. Sometimes I feel like screaming at the top of my lungs "WHY ME?!" And it doesn't make things any easier that, at the same time, I am still trying to finish my Master's. My life is a whirlwind and at times I feel like I just am not equipped to do this.

But then Christian smiles. Or gives me a kiss. Or I will come out of my room and see him sitting there waiting patiently for me to come back. Or he will start kicking and squealing in excitement when I walk in the door. Or he will put his hands on my face and give me a huge grin and babble like he is telling me "Smile, because I love you". And I feel bolstered with energy and hope. Energy to do what needs to be done, and hope that everything will work out better than I could ever imagine. And trust me, at times I just can't imagine how I will survive.

Like right now. I have very little money to my name. Not nearly enough to even begin to cover my expenses. I am facing losing my apartment (and we all know the damage that can do later on) and my car. I have several assignments due tomorrow. I have bills that are probably past due. .But I'll be damned if I'm going to let us go down without a fight.

Right now I am stressed beyond belief. But I am also blessed beyond belief. I have family and friends who love me. I have a God who...loves me isn't even the way to describe it. He just...is. I have strength and I have dedication. Being a single mom is the most challenging role that I have ever had to play. One that I had never imagined that I would be forced to take on. But if this is what God has in store for me right now, then I'm gonna be the best single mom that I can be. And I'm going to thank Him everyday for the opportunity. Because at least I have Christian. And that is worth everything to me.

:| Four months later

Lord! I just checked my blog and my last one was when Christian was FOUR MONTHS!!!!! DAYUMMMM!!!! He is nearly 9 months old now and I have written nothing. But that doesn't mean that nothing has been happening. I like to think that I have been too busy being a mom, student, and business owner to blog much. But that's no excuse. *Sigh* I had wanted so much for this to be a great, detailed chronicle of my life as a first-time mom. But, you know...I guess this fits. I have my plate overfilling with things. Not only am I chasing around a baby (who is crawling and "walking" all over the place), but I am doing it alone (unfortunately Christian's father has left us and has been away for over a month), working hard to try to pay the bills, and still working on my Master's. Life is tough. But my baby boy makes it all worth it. :D

It's amazing to think of how much he is changed over the past few months. He is eating solids like a champ. He is crawling like crazy and learning how to walk. He is starting to talk (already he has said "Hi",  "All done", and "I did it"). He laughs all the time and loves to play and explore. He has a great personality and is just an awesome little dude. I am LOVING being a mom.


Ok...so I'm not the perfect mom. I don't make all of his baby food myself. I don't breastfeed him all day. My house is not picture perfect. But I do what needs to be done. I am a single mom. I am a stay at home mom. I am a business owner. I am a student. I sing to him, play with him, read to him, feed him, teach him, cuddle him, dress him, bathe him, and love him better than anyone. I make his baby food as often as I can. I breastfeed him 3 times a day. I hold him when he cries, hold his hands while he walks, get on the ground with him to play, zoom him through the air like a plane, make noises and faces just to make him laugh. I am his teacher, his chef, his masseuse, his playmate, his best friend, his chauffeur, his personal musician and comedian. I am Super Mom. How about you?